Arguing it is actually a state of discussion, it's just delivered in a high level of emotional charge. If you know his ethics, in any arguing we can get a silver lining. Why not, instead of quarreling, each containing content words were spoken very deep feelings, which sticking with the pressure of high energy, their message was thick, more easily digested than strings attached with no emotion.
Arguing is an inevitable phenomenon in married life, when someone says: "I never arguing with my wife!" Chances of two, may be he has not married, or he was lying. Clearly we need to savor the moment arguing, as much to enjoy again the moment you not arguing.
One of them is about what to do when we argue, from a conversation until the time is ripe for it, you arrived at a Memorandum of Understanding, that if anything should arguing, then:
1. If arguing should not be in congregation.
Quite an angry just angry, which is too late to send a high tone signals have to wait until the one subside. For matters of abstinence angry congregation, one is enough to make the house so festive.
When he was angry and I want to interrupt, he immediately said "STOP" it's my turn! I must still seek forgiveness while. Stifling a smile I said to myself: "you are more beautiful when angry, the more energetic". And by that point I still feel pious charity, has become a way for signals to pass through the heart of a loved one gust ... "My lover talk continued, if in your heart it be a relief, then the wilderness feel relief that I wait".
Similarly, if the fit hit my turn "a facial muscle exercise", I assume that the distortion of the heart, pus from the soul the offense is garbage, he should be immediately disposed of so as not to spread germs, and I am not angry at anyone who dared except for my wife . :) So now it was her turn to be willing to be a waste basket. Anyway particular to be angry, do not have to congregation, because there is something better to do a congregation other than angry:)
2. Be angry only to the issue, do not bring up that has been folded period.
Anyone that tilt its past mistakes, definitely cornered, because the past is part of the history of her that she could not change. Anyone not be judged by his past love. For stretches of hope from today onwards. In any arguing we need to maintain hope, not destroy it. Because fights between people who still have hope, just a foreplay, fights two hearts were broken up, destroyed the civilization of love that has been so expensive to build.
If I come home late and he was angry, then anger over the delay was as hard as any criticism, is "the expression of longing that hard". But if it is associated with all my delay, last week, early last month and two months ago, then it makes me slumped down.
When the tea is not sweet disajinya (I include sugar hoarders), any sepedas me angry, then it is a "higher expectations cherished wish". But if they are associated with fault yesterday and three-day pass, plus charges of "It's not like ya with me", then I had him pinned to the day that has gone, I buried him in the past, oops I had killed him, killed his love. And if you love dies, I am also a hard ... OK, but for a mistake during the angry, I do not live in the past week, and he also belongs to this day .....
3. When angry do not take take the family!
I am bound by my wife a few times, but my mother and my father almost many times longer than that, so he and his brother and uncle. And someone that does not bear the mistakes of other hand.
I would not be goaded angry when my only reprimanded, but when my mother invited as well, do not try try. So is he, since I married her, I have learned to ignore anyone in the world than him, so why should carry other goods brought into the arena of "earlier this summer of love".
My father said: "Friends thousand is still lacking, the enemy one too many". Rebuked those who love me, more easy to find ma'afnya than sulk at heart and who does not know me ... "The world is on the verge of battle, no plus plus with hostile in-laws!
4. When angry do not be in front of children!
Our children are the fruit of love, not the fruit of anger and hatred. He was not born through our argument, therefore, why they should watch the wild comedy of our homes.
Children who saw his parents fighting, confusion should be taking sides. Defending his father, how her mother. Defending mother, but that 'my father's. When the boy heard his parents arguing:
* Mother: "I was tired, I clean the house, I cook, and told you to come play so, I was maid Quote ?!!!"
* Father: "I'm also tired, working all day, you're asking this and that and I should find a lot more to it, I came but there was no glory, Quote me this horse ????!!!!
* Children: "...... Yaaa ... my mother's maid, my father kept my horse .... what? "^ _ ^
We must dare to say: "Stop the fight!" when the child comes, look into their eyes, in the light of his eyes there is longing and togetherness. In our laughter there are traces of a romantic partnership, should he hear the word stale our hearts?
5. If we love each other, we must forgive each other. But clearly it is, as long as there is love, fight only "the process of learning to love more intense". Apparently there are still loyal to us even have our slang.
Just this, may could be useful ..
If you are interested in articles in this blog, please subscribe for free via RSS Feed. Or if you prefer a free subscription via email, please click Here.
RSS Feed
Twitter
1/18/2012 12:32:00 PM
andi rusmana
Posts
